Why Awareness Continues to Be Important
By Renée Carrico, Pro Bono and Elder Justice Coordinator
“Aren’t we aware by now?” Someone recently asked me this when I mentioned Domestic Violence Awareness Month was coming up in October. Obviously not. My acquaintance, like many people, imagines a younger woman with children when they think of domestic violence or abuse. However, abuse can and does happen across a lifespan. As people age, the abuse in a relationship may evolve and the needs of the survivor may change but the abuse is still there. We just don’t see it, think about it or can’t believe it still happens as people get older. The knock on effect is that certain groups are excluded from research and prevention campaigns.[1] With education and awareness comes opportunity to change that narrative.
The terms we use to describe and categorize abuse - Domestic Violence (DV), Intimate Partner Violence (IPV), Abuse Later in Life (ALL), Elder Abuse (EA)[2] – can be both too broad and too narrow to capture accurately the full range of people’s attitudes, outlooks, and experiences.[3] Is a caregiver spouse who is abusing a partner committing domestic violence? Intimate partner violence? Elder abuse? All of the above? These overlapping categories can make it difficult to describe the issue of domestic violence against older victims and to find accurate statistics to address its prevalence.
Research on older adults has lagged behind research into other aspects of interpersonal violence but we do know that while physical violence toward women declines as they age, emotional and psychological abuse becomes more prevalent, including financial coercion and verbal threats.[4] Power and control are still key in domestic violence as people age. Research suggests that the dynamics between older victims and abusers are more like those of younger adults than they are different; however, the experience of older victims may be very different, they don’t seek services and their concerns are underreported and or discounted.[5]
Older victims of domestic violence are often isolated. They may not know they are being abused or understand that they don’t have endure the abuse they are experiencing. They may be pressured by family to stay silent, or not know where to report abuse. Most importantly, no one ever asks them if they are being abused.[6]
How is it possible for someone not to know they are being abused? It might be helpful to put the issue into context by considering how someone from each generation currently living might understand domestic violence. Even though, much like the divisions between DV, IPV, ALL, and EA, generational categories are imperfect[7], they provide a useful framework for thinking about this issue.
Are you of the Silent Generation (born 1928-1945), a Baby Boomer (born 1946-1964), a Gen X (1965-1976/80), a Millennial (1981-1994/96) or a Gen Z (1995/97-2012)? Generationally speaking, domestic violence laws are relatively new. Your generational context might affect your understanding and perception of domestic violence and your personal choices when confronted with it. In addition, people may understand that domestic violence is wrong, but that does not always translate to personal action and perception.[8] People’s attitudes, habits, and actions can take significant time to catch up to laws.
Many current politicians and lawmakers are Baby Boomers and more than a few are from the Silent Generation. As an example, Supreme Court Justice Breyer, age 83, is from the Silent Generation and five of the other nine justices are Boomers. They grew up in an era when domestic violence was a private matter. Husbands and fathers had the control of finance and attitudes about gender roles were much different.
Women of the Silent and Boomer generations did not have equal access to credit until 1974, halfway through Gen X. Women could not get a credit card in their own name if they were married. All finances equal, women were regularly denied credit and received significantly less in loans, if approved, than men received.[9] Money may not buy happiness, but it goes a long way to securing independence and empowerment.
Millennials were just toddlers when the Family Violence Prevention and Services Act passed in 1984, nationally recognizing the need for emergency housing and support services for victims of domestic violence and their dependents for the first time.[10] It took another nine years for marital rape to be banned in all 50 states and the District (30 states still have exceptions).[11] It wasn’t until 1994 and the dawn of Gen Z that the first comprehensive legislation was passed to address domestic violence, through the Violence Against Women Act.[12] The Me Too movement started in mid Gen Z, in 2006, but only really gained nationwide notice in 2017, with several high profile cases.[13]
In this context, it is easy to see why we continue to recognize Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Why someone might not understand that they don’t have to remain in the situation they are in. People’s attitudes and perceptions don’t change overnight, but through the right messaging, awareness and action, we can change that and improve our future.
[1] Crockett C, Brandl B, Dabby FC. Survivors in the Margins: The Invisibility of Violence Against Older Women. J Elder Abuse Negl. 2015;27(4-5):291-302. doi: 10.1080/08946566.2015.1090361. Epub 2015 Sep 15. PMID: 26371877, 293
[2] Abuse later in life includes Gen X age 50+. https://www.ncall.us/abuse-in-later-life/
[3] Crocket C, 293
[4] Crockett C, 294.
[5] Brandl, Bonnie. “Power and Control: Understanding Domestic Abuse in Later Life.” Generations: Journal of the American Society on Aging, vol. 24, no. 2, 2000, pp. 39–45. and https://ncadv.org/blog/posts/quick-guide-domestic-abuse-in-later-life
[6] Brandl, 43.
[7] https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2021/07/07/generation-labels-mean-nothing-retire-them/
[8] Crocker, 296
[9] https://www.nytimes.com/1974/10/11/archives/congress-passes-bill-banning-bias-against-women-on-credit-women.html
[10] http://www.learnaboutfvpsa.com/35yrs-impact
[11] https://vawnet.org/material/marital-rape-new-research-and-directions
[12] https://mainweb-v.musc.edu/vawprevention/policy/vawa.shtml
[13] https://metoomvmt.org/get-to-know-us/history-inception/